How to Secure Dates 2 and 3
The first date is going brilliantly. He’s funny, gorgeous, and charming.
You are enjoying every moment, but you keep thinking about how to secure more dates with this hottie.
The most important thing to remember is that no matter how many times men say that they like being asked out, it generally won’t get you a second date. His ego might be elevated for a moment, but the excitement of being pursued will fade.
Men enjoy the anticipation and challenge of courting a woman more than the conquest of getting her. Securing those second and thirds dates means letting him chase you.
SECRET LESSON:
If a man is interested in you, he will court you. It can’t be forced.
All patterns with men and women show that men like to do the courting. Thus, a woman must not initiate the courtship.
But it’s difficult for a woman to wait for a man to ask her out, which is why so many women take the initiative. But this leads to unfulfilled longing and unrealistic expectations of a relationship because it goes against a man’s instinct. It usually doesn’t produce positive results.
If a woman chases a man and proposes a second date, the man will feel the decision was made for him. He then isn't sure if he's going on a date because he wants to or only as a favor to make her happy. The man may end up pursuing the woman or asking her out again, but by rushing the relationship, she ruins the probability of it being successful.
To develop true intense feelings for a woman, a man must discover these feelings for himself. You can’t disregard this important step in the relationship process.
To increase your chances of being asked out again, all you need to do is play it cool and let him reach out to you.
Be assertive in your interest to go out by using affirmative dialogue:
“There’s a great coffee place near here. We can go there next time.”
“I have had such a great night we should do it again.”
Additionally, you can let him know you are interested in a second date by subtly bringing it up in conversation:
Him: "I have been playing tennis for five years."
You: "We should arrange a coaching session. I could do with some improvement."
You are expressing your desire to see him again and signaling your interest, but not coming on too strong.
A great way to amplify his interest is when the first date is ending. If you don’t like him, be courteous and tell him that you thoroughly enjoyed your date, but have an early day tomorrow. Don’t give him excuses or explanations.
If you do like him, when you say goodbye use the same phrase, but add that you hope to do it again soon. This will keep him wanting more because he must work to retain your attention and you put the ball is in his court. He can now make a move. You want to make him feel the need to chase you.
If he's interested in you and wants to see you again, you'll most likely hear from him by the end of “day or the following day. In the meantime, do not contact him to say thank you or good night. Use your time with him to communicate your appreciation for the date. If he texts you first, wait at least 30 minutes before responding with a short, but friendly response.
The main point is to be open and engaging, but make him do the pursuing. When you allow him to pursue you, you’re allowing him to feel like a man, which immediately makes you more desirable.
xxx
Leandra
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